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A dude had a shoe box that he would finish in every time he jerked off. It was all crusted over, and he tried burning it at one point, but it wouldn’t burn. He even made a follow up post at some point when he moved houses, saying he brought the cum box with him. It had started to mold over.

You can google “reddit cumbox,” if you’d like.

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Uh, I think I gotta politely decline. Didn't want to google because I was hoping on a short summary like yours, so thanks, I guess.

READ IT. It's a rite of passage

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ʕ ͡° ʖ̯ ͡°ʔ no.

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I wasn't aware of the HR cap related to the Tempered Bagel quest, so I finally tried it yesterday.

Embarrassing to say I've never actually hunted a B52 prior to this quest, but I went ahead and tried it. I was able to complete it without carting in 20' and it felt amazing! I was shaking by the end, but extremely proud to have killed two tempered Beezels without dying.

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Tempered Bagel <3

What's that subreddit with the band names again?

finally capture that stupid fossil fish (3 hours)

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Sounds like a pain! I've never heard of it - what is it and what do you need it for?

I estimate 30-40ft

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Original Poster-1 points · 3 months ago

One of those fun at parties guys, I suppose..?

Hope he's not the guy showing people pointless photographs.

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Original Poster0 points · 3 months ago

Oof

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When hooman fake throws ball 1 too many times and you figure you’re better off on your own.

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This made me actually sad.

The real question is why people wash out shampoo while facing the ground instead of the air

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Wait, what?

Brb testing this.

Original Poster33 points · 5 months ago

...Lower left corner, dude.

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Hey mate, mind eli5 how a watermark like this prevents others from just 'stealing' your art? I can see myself photoshopping that mark out and I suck with PS, so I can't think of a way this actually does something for copyright...

Kinda looks like a happy condom snake to me..

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Happy snek issss happy to protect you

I'm amazed this joke is still upvoted on Reddit...

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What's its root? I've seen it acouple times now and never thought of it as an inside joke...

URGENT! If you're not feeling your sense of pride and accomplishment right now, you're not paying enough money.

Am on phone, is this legit?

Original Poster1 point · 7 months ago

Yessir, no hidden shipping fees or anything like that. 16 out of 3000 have already won and the winners are drawn by complete chance.

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Awwww man, not available in Germany. :(

I really had a hard time figuring out what kind of meat lump that is in the left side.

I am tired.

6

Hey u/iamthatis!

Thanks for the fantastic app. I've found everything I was looking for for the experience that offers the best of the Alien Blue and the Reddit app - and there're still so many more neat features!

However, there's one thing that unfortunately really bothers me. Whenever I'm 'in a post' and spend more than just a very brief moment there, I find that /r/all began updating the ranking of the top posts so that I have to sometimes scroll through posts I have already seen on my daily scrolling odyssey. Not to mention, as I usually only scroll downwards, I probably don't see every post of that day as some will rise up and higher than the current post I was looking at.

With all that's going on in this subreddit, I'm sure there are more... pressuring issues/requests, but maybe you could include an option later on that disables auto-updating r/all, or something alike. I would be very thankful!

Sincerely, u/janjansohn

There isn’t much Apollo’s developer can do to avoid it unless he wanted to develop a complex system to ignore seen threads when refreshing r/all.

This happens because when an app polls Reddit for page 1 of r/all Reddit responds with what’s on page 1 right now. Meanwhile, if a thread gets pushed to page 2 even if it was on page 1 before polling for page 2 will give you the same thread again. This happens with new threads too, with page 1 having new threads but not being able to be seen unless you refresh the whole r/all.

At least this is my rudimentary understanding of the problem.

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Original Poster1 point · 7 months ago

That makes sense. Would it be somehow possible to poll more at once instead? That way it became more unlikely for a post to move that much and would probably reduce the things one has already read pop up again, right?

I may be ignorant here, but I feel like this has not happened in the official app (that much).

I'm no expert when it comes to Reddit API but it'd probably be possible to request more pages from r/all at once. When it comes to the official app I wouldn't put too much thought behind it, they probably have access to private, more functional APIs so what it can do isn't always possible on other unnofficial apps.

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Original Poster1 point · 7 months ago

I can totally see that.

Thanks for your response mate.

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Ok so I don't shower every day (gross, yeah yeah... I know) but so anyway when I change my sheets I always time it with one of my showers and theres nothing like being completely clean and sleeping on clean sheets!!

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Original Poster2 points · 7 months ago

I can relate dude!

i hear ya, we all have our stress relief methods!!

Edit: HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

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Original Poster1 point · 7 months ago

Thanks mate!

Oh my god, CNN and CNN

that’s amazing

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Mind explaining why? The only thing making sense to me would be something like: Fake news and liberal (equaling gay...?) Or is there some kind of subtle humor? CNN = See an N?

I'm German so this kinda goes beyond my understanding for puns and subtle humor. :(

CNN = fake

CNN = gay

so by saying "CNN and CNN", you're saying fake and gay

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Thanks, that was too obvious I guess...

Well looking it up I found this from 2009.

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Aw man I was really getting all excited about how the commenter above nuked the bullshit outta this post and now it seems like this was not an r/QuitYourBullshit kinda post.

-6 points · 7 months ago · edited 7 months ago

Can somebody do the math for me?

If the average person lives up to age x, what is thirty percent of x and how much money do you spend on average in those years that now are cut off? Also, is there a way to determine how much the average person would have to smoke in order to die thirty years earlier than expected?

/r/TheyDidTheMath pls, I want to be fun at parties.

edit: I meant, mean and always will mean to say

Haha :D

Average life expectancy in America is 78.74 years, I'll round this to 79. You can't smoke until you're 18 (may be different in some states, I'm just going off google here) so you'll only be able to smoke for 61 years legally. First result on Google says the average cost for a pack of 20 is $5.51, and to make it easy I'll just say a person smokes 20 a day. 30% of 61 is 18.3 years, so you'll live for about 42 years and 8 months smoking. Over those years, you'll spend approximately $86,000, assuming you don't have any unexpected illnesses and have to go to hospital (which would be pretty unlikely), to end your adult life 30% sooner. If you have a gross income of $35,000, you pay 8.4% of that in federal tax, according to this site every year. So on that income, you'll end up paying nearly $55,000 in tax alone in the years you would be dead from smoking. Working out how much a person spends on other items is too much work and I can't be bothered.

So yes, it is cheaper to smoke all your adult life and die 30% sooner, than it is to live.

I mean, Haha :D

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Haha :D

How many Gs do you think the driver experienced there?

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I hereby summon the great gods of /r/TheyDidTheMath

1.8k points · 7 months ago

The misspelling of you're was what makes this so valuable.

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I also love the fact they capitalized Rick and Morty in their google search.

u/janjansohn
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Cake day
January 12, 2016

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Since April 2016